The Moment That Redefined My Identity
The Question That Changed Everything
“Are you adopted?”
The question caught me off guard. Until that moment, I had never questioned my identity. I was the youngest in my family, and that was that. But suddenly, doubt crept in.
I looked different from my sisters. They had straight hair, lighter skin, and almond-shaped eyes—features they all shared. I, on the other hand, had curly hair, a darker complexion, and different eyes. Compared to them, I stood out.
At first, I brushed it off. But the more people pointed it out, the more I wondered—Was I really part of this family? Did I truly belong?
When I asked my parents, they reassured me: “You look like your grandparents.” Since my grandparents had passed before I was born, I had no way to compare. I clung to that explanation, trying to quiet the questions in my head.
But even then, something lingered.
The Moment My Identity Was Shaken
At first, the idea that I might not be biologically related to my family was just a passing thought—a question planted by friends who noticed how different I looked. But it wasn’t until one heated moment that those suspicions became real.
My sister was upset with me, and in the middle of her frustration, she yelled:
“Do you really want to know who you are?”
Something about the way she said it hit differently. It wasn’t just anger. There was something deeper behind her words—something I needed to know.
My heart pounded as I ran to my mom. What did she mean?
I still remember the hesitation in my mother’s face when I asked. She looked at me, unsure of what to say. I could tell she hadn’t planned to tell me—not yet.
But after a pause, she finally confirmed it:
“Yes, you were adopted.”
In that moment, it felt like the ground beneath me shifted. This wasn’t just a question anymore—it was my reality.
But before I could even process what it meant, my mom looked me in the eyes and said words that would stay with me forever:
“Just remember this—you will always be mine.”
From Doubt to Gratitude: Reframing My Identity
At first, I felt like my identity had been shattered. My sense of belonging, my place in the family—everything felt uncertain. If I wasn’t born into this family, then who was I, really?
But as the shock settled, I began to reframe the situation.
Yes, I was adopted. But that didn’t mean I didn’t belong. In fact, it meant I had been chosen.
My parents didn’t just end up with me by default—they chose me. They didn’t have to take me in, love me, raise me, or provide for me. But they did. They gave me the same privileges, the same love, and the same name as my sisters.
Instead of feeling like I was missing something, I realized I had gained something special. I wasn’t just accepted—I was wanted.
“For He chose us in Him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in His sight. In love, He predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ.” — Ephesians 1:4-5
This changed my entire perspective. Instead of living with entitlement, I lived with gratitude. I had been given a life I wouldn’t have had otherwise, and I refused to take that for granted.
A Spiritual Parallel: My Adoption Into God’s Family
Later in life, I began to see how my adoption into my earthly family reflected my adoption into God’s family.
I wasn’t born into God’s chosen people. I’m not an Israelite. But because of Jesus, I was grafted in.
I get to share in the blessings and inheritance of God’s family—not because I earned it, but because I was chosen. Just like with my parents, God brought me in intentionally, not accidentally.
Romans 11:17 describes this perfectly:
“If some of the branches have been broken off, and you, though a wild olive shoot, have been grafted in among the others and now share in the nourishing sap from the olive root, do not consider yourself superior to those other branches.”
Just like an olive tree branch is grafted into the tree and becomes part of it, I was brought into God’s family and given full access to His promises.
I didn’t have to do anything to deserve it. I just had to accept the gift.
Security in My Identity
Because of this, I no longer feel the need to seek approval from others or prove my worth. My identity isn’t found in people’s opinions—it’s found in God.
I know who I am. I am chosen. I am loved. I am His.
“The fear of human opinion disables; trusting in God protects you from that.” — Proverbs 29:25 (MSG)
This truth has helped me navigate so many moments in life where my identity was challenged—whether by rejection, criticism, or misunderstanding.
I used to let those things shake me. But now? I stand firm in who God says I am.
Words to My Younger Self
If I could go back and talk to the girl who was questioning everything, I would simply tell her:
“Have faith. Everything will always work out. God has your back, even when it feels like He doesn’t. If you don’t see Him moving, it’s because He’s working behind the scenes on something incredible.”
It reminds me of how when ARMY doesn’t hear from BTS for a while, we know they’re preparing something amazing. God works the same way. If I don’t see Him, it just means He’s preparing something greater than I can imagine.
All I have to do is wait, trust, and be grateful.
“If you live for people’s acceptance, you’ll die from their rejection.” — Lecrae
Self-Reflection: Where Do You Find Your Identity?
Take a moment to reflect:
1. Do you ever feel like you need external validation to feel secure in who you are?
2. How do you respond when your identity is challenged—do you turn to God, or do you let doubt take over?
3. What would change if you fully embraced the truth that you are chosen, loved, and fully accepted by God?
Final Thoughts: Living From a Place of Security
I used to question who I was, but now, I stand firm in my identity. I don’t need people’s approval to know my worth.
I am chosen.
I am loved.
I am His.
And that is enough.
If you’ve ever questioned where you belong, know this: You are seen. You are valued. And you have been chosen by God Himself.
A Prayer for Those Who Struggle With Identity
Father, thank You that my identity is secure in You. I don’t have to seek validation from others because You have already called me Your own. Help me to rest in the truth that I am chosen, loved, and fully accepted by You. Even when doubts creep in, remind me that I belong—not because of anything I’ve done, but because of Your love. In Jesus’ name, Amen.
Let’s Talk: Share Your Thoughts
• Have you ever struggled with your identity?
• How has God helped you feel secure in who you are?
Share in the comments—I’d love to hear your story!
© 2025 Amelie Chambord
Soul Path Insights 
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