Understanding the Stories We Don’t See

I drove to an event in Boyle Heights, passing through streets lined with tents and makeshift shelters. Seeing so many people struggling—some visibly dealing with addiction or mental illness—stirred a mix of emotions in me: sadness, compassion, and discomfort. I wondered about their stories, the events that led them there. As I drove on, Jesus’ words echoed in my heart: “Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me” (Matthew 25:40).

That moment reminded me how easy it is to judge, yet how much harder it is to truly see others. Each person I saw has a story, shaped by pain, choices, or circumstances beyond my understanding. Mother Teresa’s words came to mind: “If you judge people, you have no time to love them.” Love, I realized, requires looking past appearances and stepping into compassion.

From Homelessness to Family Dynamics

This idea of unseen struggles isn’t confined to strangers. My sister’s story is a powerful reminder of that. For years, my family labeled her as the “black sheep,” not knowing the pain she was carrying. She had witnessed my father’s infidelity—a betrayal that shaped her anger and actions in ways we didn’t understand.

When she finally shared her experience, everything made sense. “Do not judge by appearances, but judge with right judgment” (John 7:24). Her rebellion wasn’t simply “bad behavior”; it was a cry born of deep hurt. Reflecting on this now, I see how blind judgment robbed us of understanding her. As Brené Brown said, “Compassion is not a relationship between the healer and the wounded. It’s a relationship between equals.” Learning her story was humbling, teaching me to approach others with grace, not criticism.

Lessons from Rajiv Parti’s Journey

These reflections deepened as I listened to Rajiv Parti’s audiobook. His near-death experience transformed his understanding of compassion and forgiveness, especially toward his father. In the afterlife, he saw his father’s struggles, the challenges that shaped their strained relationship. That moment gave him clarity, leading to healing and forgiveness. His story resonated deeply with my own journey toward understanding my sister.

As Rajiv shared, unresolved anger and judgment weigh us down. Forgiving isn’t about excusing actions; it’s about freeing ourselves and others. His insights reminded me of Paul’s words: “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you” (Ephesians 4:32). Forgiveness, fueled by compassion, is a powerful force for transformation.

Soul Insights

1. Compassion starts with curiosity. When we pause to ask, “What might this person be going through?” we open the door to understanding and empathy.

2. Judgment is a barrier to love. Like Jesus with the woman at the well, withholding judgment allows us to extend grace and see people as they truly are.

3. Forgiveness heals both sides. Resentment weighs us down, but forgiveness releases that burden, paving the way for healing and peace.

4. Everyone carries unseen struggles. Whether it’s a homeless stranger or a family member, we rarely see the full picture. Everyone’s journey is shaped by experiences we may never fully know.

5. Love is an active choice. True compassion isn’t passive; it’s choosing to see others with God’s eyes and respond with grace, even when it’s challenging.

Final Thoughts

As I reflect on today, I see how compassion is both simple and profound. It starts with small acts—choosing to pause, listen, and see beyond appearances. Whether it’s the homeless in Boyle Heights, my sister’s story, or Rajiv Parti’s insights, each reminds me that love is the bridge between judgment and understanding.

Jesus said, “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy” (Matthew 5:7). Mercy, like compassion, is a daily practice—one that transforms not only those we extend it to but also our own hearts. My prayer is to grow in this mercy, seeing others with the same grace that God extends to us.

So today, I challenge myself—and you—to seek the stories we don’t see. Whether it’s a stranger, a friend, or a family member, let’s ask: “What might they be going through?” In doing so, we open our hearts to the healing power of love.

Soul Path Insights